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We all experience moments in our lives when a sense of
dis-ease becomes impossible to ignore.

The trigger can be physical symptoms, depression, challenges in our relationships, an inner sense of emptiness…. The first reaction is to try to find a fix, a magic pill. But truly, it is a deep aspect of ourselves that is calling out for us to delve within and face some aspect of ourselves that we have been running from. I have learned to pay attention to that inner urging that calls us to risk breaking out of the box. After all, it was this urging that led me on the path to becoming an energy healer and astrologer with a practice in Washington DC. It was also this urging for greater authenticity that has led me to change my name from Margarita Crocker to Martina Crocker.

People often ask me how a Harvard and MIT educated scientist became a practicing energy healer and astrologer.

Of course, with my background in physics and nuclear engineering I was versed in viewing energy as the basis of all things. The fields I had pursued academically gave me insight into the western paradigm of energy, thus preparing me for the broader, more holistic Eastern paradigms that view the human mind, body and spirit as a single energetic entity. But the actual experience of the transition I went through was not so smooth and seamless. Rather, it was fueled by inner and outer crises and prolonged periods of doubt. I experienced the dissolution of a way to thinking that had made my world seem predictable and safe. I had to admit that my analytical mind, which had served me so well in my academic pursuits, was ill-equipped to provide guidance in this larger realm. Instead I had to open to new ways of thinking and seeing the world.

As I delved into studies of the human energy field and ancient healing practices, the most challenging aspect of my training was learning to trust the parts of myself that were beyond the scope of the rational mind. I had to learn to listen to the quiet voice within, often referred to as one's intuition, higher self or compassionate heart, which pointed in the direction of the next step both in terms of my life and later in working with my clients.

My own journey took me into the study of energy healing, into the practice of yoga and meditation, and into the exploration of a multiplicity of spiritual traditions.

I traveled to sacred sites in Asia, Europe and the Americas. It was a journey of opening, of getting outside the academic box and of embracing teachings that couldn’t easily be reconciled with my academic training. And yet, I could sense deep within myself that this was leading me to the truth I was seeking. Meditation helped teach me about the richness of being in the present moment, of looking at things as they were instead of constantly searching for a fix or solution. And I finally learned that the first step to being in the present moment was slowing down. In our goal-oriented society, how hard it is to really accept that it is the process or the journey, not the destination that provide the richness of life. How I struggled with this—and sometimes still do! And yet I had to go through my own journey, my own transformational experience, to be able to help facilitate this process for my clients. I have come to honor that for each person this journey is a unique one.

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